Moving Forward

Had my first post-chemo appointment with a plastic surgeon this week. The good news is he's likable, thorough, and professional. The bad news is he sees a need to redo my temporary expander. Apparently the one that was put in at my surgery in July has shifted, and it hasn't done a good enough job. What that means in the short term is that the surgery I had hoped would be my last will in fact be my second-to-last. They'll replace this expander with another one and I'll go through the expansion process again all this summer and into the fall. Hopefully I'll get the real deal placed late fall/early winter.

Because Eric and I are going to try to ride in Ragbrai and we're in a wedding that same week in July, time was of the essence. As a result, I'm going in for surgery on the 20th, just under two weeks away. I won't be able to exercise for 6 weeks, hence the need to get surgery done so I can get back on the bike as soon as possible. It means another week of missed work, but fortunately my Mayo appointment with my oncologist also falls in that week, so I won't miss yet another day. I won't be allowed to lift anything heavier than 10 pounds for a month, so that will prove interesting with Cavanaugh. I'm sure if I explain it to her she'll understand...

Happy Easter!
Carpe diem -- Trela

Vegas, Baby

Here I am with the new do! This is in the Wynn, which seemed to be competing with the Bellagio for a botanical display while we were there. (I think the Bellagio wins, hands down, granted I loved these floral balls.) Eric and I had an AMAZING time in Las Vegas for our Spring Break. Won a little, lost a little (I did better on penny slots than he did playing cards), saw "O" from Cirque du Soleil, walked a TON, and relaxed by the pool. I was pretty happy with my energy level (we were a little worried because my second to last chemo had made me pretty tired the four to five days following it, but I think I was just getting over that flu), I really had no trouble keeping up walking around, and let's face it, I'm always in bed by 11 anyway.

We also got to see my friend Lisa and her husband. She's a frequent poster to the blog, so it was nice to see them again after about 15 years. Above is a picture of us at dinner. It was good to see "real" people while we were in Vegas... you kind of expect the plastic and neon, but to spend time with people who are pretty much like you makes it all feel a little more grounded. Our hotel helped with that, too. It was associated with the MGM Grand, but didn't have a casino itself. It was great to be able to leave all of that noise and smoke and craziness behind... kind of an oasis in the chaos. Loved the chaos, but it was awesome to leave it behind when we wanted.

Anyway, life has been busy since our return -- Eric got the flu on our flight back so we stayed in Milwaukee an extra day. He was pretty down and out the last few days of my "break," so I didn't get too much more relaxing done.

Kile and Cavanaugh were in their babysitters' wedding on St. Patrick's day. We had a few tense moments when both of them burst into tears and screams when it was time for pictures before the ceremony, but everything was fine for the wedding itself. Kile was a trooper, put on his Hollywood smile and walked down the aisle pulling Cavanaugh in a wagon behind him. Nathan and Betsy were pleased, and that's the most important part!

We heard excellent news this week that Eric's Uncle Joe, who was diagnosed with stomach cancer this fall, has had tremendous results with his chemotherapy. Pretty much all of the cancer evidence in the rest of his body is gone, leaving only the original stomach tumor. Not sure what the next plan will be, but I know the entire family is pretty relieved!

Anyway, it's 75 degrees here today and that garden is calling my name. I felt badly that I hadn't gotten around to posting yet, but like I said, it's been CRAZY busy for us! I'm headed to Mayo again in the next month for a follow-up appointment with my oncologist there. It's not supposed to be a big deal, but they will want to review my CT. Wish me luck!

Carpe diem. -- Trela

Two Hundred and Sixty-Eight Days Later...

In celebration of my last chemo, today was my first official outing without my "new hair" as Kile calls it. We had a little fun with the thingy before I put it in it's box. I know, scary how much Kile looks like me. My oncology office was a safe test zone since half of the patients wear hats or nothing at all, though they never saw me without my "hair" until today. One of my nurses actually said, "Wow, cute hair! When did you get it cut?" She's been my pre-doctor nurse since September, just didn't realize I was wearing a wig almost the whole time.

It's really amazing how quickly two-thirds of a year can go. I can't believe I'm to the point that 268 days ago I didn't honestly believe I would see, at least not in apparent good health. Fortunately, I'm alive, I'm WELL (to think that phrase used to just roll of my tongue when people asked how I was... I think about it a lot more now!), and amazingly enough I'm finished with chemotherapy.

My last session went well. It happened to be the clinic's Daffodil Day (an American Cancer Society ritual which is pretty cool.. .the whole place was filled with the yellow buggers), so everything was very festive if not a bit more chaotic than normal.



My labs were decent, white cells down a bit, but still much better than my Girl In the Plastic Bubble days. Meeting with my doctor went well, also. He's cleared me for resuming "normal" activities (like working out in a facility or taking yoga classes) as of a couple weeks from now, going to the dentist (yippie), and scheduling meetings with a plastic surgeon to "finish up." He confirmed that my CT looked basically fine, a little more density around the expander, but he expected that. He did mention I'll need to return to Mayo at the end of the month to meet with my oncologist there, who would also review my CT. He thinks I'll need to be heading up there once or twice a year, but I will still be able to do the majority of my testing in Cedar Rapids. The next appointment there is for a chest x-ray (to make sure nothing has developed in my lungs) in late May.

Ironically, he missed work last week because HE was stuck in the same "hotel" that I had been with pneumonia. We had an exciting conversation about the charm of 4:30am labs and 6am trips to radiology for chest x-rays (the only perk being the warm blankets they give you upon return).

Chemo was no big deal, although my nurses were extra charming. I was apparently successful in Chemo 101, the primary lesson being to make the nurses love you -- they brought me a DOZEN salmon colored roses (which they had to pretend were from someone mysterious so the other patients didn't get jealous). So incredibly sweet... and totally unexpected. I got bubbles and the kazoo version of "Pomp and Circumstance" as they unhooked my IV. I really will miss those girls. In a different time, different place, we all probably would have been friends!

Eric and I spent the evening finalizing our packing as we're planning to head out of town tomorrow after work. We'll spend the night in Milwaukee and then fly out to Las Vegas early Saturday morning.

I still can't believe it's been 268 days. (Nor can I believe I counted them.) This really has been an amazing experience. I know I've learned at least that many things about myself in this relatively brief time. I'm so grateful for the support of all of you... just looking at our blog counter even if there aren't any additional comments reminds me that I matter. Enough mushy. Catch you on the flip side...

Carpe diem. - Trela

All Clear!

Well, it's official! I'm completely CANCER FREE! I had a CT scan last Wednesday, earlier than planned because Eric decided I was stressing too much. He called the oncology office to move up the timeline. Of course, I was furious, but realized he was right. The initial read of the scan showed no problems, but we had to wait until last night to hear the official all clear. Phew. Now we just have to continue to hope and pray that the follow-up CT's go the same way. I'm not sure of the schedule for them yet, but I'm guessing it's going to be an every 3 months sort of routine.

Eric and I are celebrating the good news (and the end of my chemo, which is tomorrow) with a Spring Break trip to Las Vegas next week. We're looking forward to warmer weather and a chance to relax and actually sleep (since of course our darling daughter still wakes up at least twice most nights).

I'll post tomorrow after my chemo. I can't believe it's been six months already!
Carpe diem!!! - Trela

Defying Gravity

After a nine hour drive to Milwaukee Friday evening (it's normally about four hours) due to the extensive winter storm, Mom and I met Cara in Chicago for our Christmas present -- tickets to "Wicked" and dinner. Don't we look theatrical? The show was great (though if you loved the book, put some distance between your read and seeing the stage production, because they're about as similar as my two children -- same parents, TOTALLY different personalities). The music is pretty modern, less chorus/verse/chorus than the traditional Broadway, and I've been listening to my cd since I returned home. My current fave inspired the title for today's blog. Nifty lyrics, and the final number before intermission, and those are usually pretty cool. Very carpe diem-esque, so of course I loved it. I think I actually liked the actresses in Chicago better -- the two witches have a number of songs together, and the Chicago girls had more easily distinguishable voices than the two on my cd from the New York company. Ah well, whatcha gonna do? The revived Oriental theater is very pretty if not a bit cozy. Chicago has done much to revamp its theater district (ok, wait, I don't' remember it even having a theater district), though we had to walk with heads ducked down in disapproval past the corner formerly housing Marshal Fields which is now yet another Macy's. Scowl, scowl. And when did this blog become a venue for theater criticism? Guess it's good I don't get out more...

Anyhoo, everything else is going well for us. My flu finally broke up a week ago Saturday, so it waylayed me for a full 9 days. When it was gone, it was totally gone, so that was a bit of a bright spot. I just woke up Saturday morning and felt totally fine. We'll take it! I ended up missing that entire week of school, though Friday was questionable. I think I could have done it, but it was probably better not to risk it. And Eric likely would have chained me to a chair or something, so it's always good to avoid that level of marital strife...

On another note, I'm now two thirds of the way finished with my LAST, repeat, LAST chemotherapy round (fingers crossed). My toes hit a low point last week in terms of numbness and tinglies, but those have actually gotten better since then. I still (crossing fingers again) don't have any problem with my fingers, and have also seemingly lucked out on the muscle and joint pain frequently associated with Taxol. My fellow chemo patients who sit around my area all seem to be susceptible to that problem. Unfortunately, my eyebrows and lashes are choosing NOW to thin quite a bit, so we'll see if I lose them completely... such timing! My hair itself is growing, albeit slowly. I actually have a hair appointment set for myself next week to see if anything can be done to shape it yet. My biggest hair problem now is making sure the wig covers my REAL hair. Such a nice complication!

Kids are doing well, Cavanaugh is now officially 10 months old and at the "I could probably walk, but crawling is SO much faster" stage. She's still tiny (checking in at 17.5 pounds and in the 25th percentile), but she's growing on pace for her size, so there don't seem to be any worries there. Kile is returning to his formerly happy self (he's been a bit of a pill the last few months), and Eric and I are thrilled to have our son back. Our newest agreement with him is that our names are Mommy and Daddy until he is five. Then we can be Mom and Dad. He thinks its' funny. He's currently looking forward to starting preschool, something we're hoping to do late this spring. Eric continues to be busy with both the Jesup and Waterloo clinics, though he did take off the entire day today to go with me to chemo. Such a nice guy... if only I could get him to pick up his laundry. Work wise, life is busy for me! My oncologist and I had a discussion last week about our choice of professions, that both seem to be regarded by the rest of the world as something that someone has to do, but no one else wants to! Frankly, most days I think he has a much rougher go of it. At least I get summers off!

Carpe diem! - Trela

You Know You've Been On Chemo If...

a standard, minor, run-of-the-mill, non-strep virus knocks you on your tail for, um, going on 6 days now.

Sigh.

Sitting at dinner tonight arguing ("arguing:" a term that currently means trying to speak at a forceful level while at the same time desperately trying to swallow dinner and maintain an "I'm cool" expression when in fact each throat movement makes me feel like some strange, yet to be read about Harry Potter baddy is stabbing me from the inside) with Eric about how I WAS going to work tomorrow I realized, hmm, this must be one heck of a virus if I'm STILL feeling the effects of it nearly a week later.

No, Trela, he responded, you have no imune system. It's having to work overtime to kill the bug, therefore taking longer for you to feel better.

Oh. Well I'm still going to work tomorrow.

With the sudafed and pain killers you're needing to take every 3 hours and 59 minutes precisely?

(sheepishly) Yes. (more forcefully, at least until my throat twinges again) With the drugs. I'll be fine. (shooting the daring "and you can't stop me" look, especially impressive while I'm wearing my striped pajama pants and pink fuzzy slippers.)

At which point my dear husband pulled the secretary card, the card he reserves for dire emergencies, the card that lets me know he's deadly serious. We also call this card "Holly." He's threatening to call our building secretary in person so that she knows to bar the door if I appear at school in the morning. My fear of her wrath is far greater than living with him, so I guess I'm going to let it slide this time...

...but I'm totally going to work on Thursday.

Happy Valentine's Day!
Carpe diem. - Trela

Taking a Day

Here are the babies! Kile hasn't made it into too many pictures recently (partially because it's hard to get him to sit still, but also because if I ask him to smile he does this cheesy-possessed -by-a-zombie-type grin that's too creepy for publication), so I thought it was time to include him. With all of the snow our bird feeders are suddenly very busy and Cavanaugh is disapointed when she looks out at night and sees no activity. Both kids love these plush little guys, though! Mom and Dad have kept us well-supplied in Cornell Labs birds that sound just like the real thing since Kile was about 6 months old. They get a giggle from Cavanaugh almost every time Kile pulls them out. For some reason she finds the Blue Jay the funniest...

Anyway, I'm home alone today, and it's rather strange to be home sick with something NOT related to chemotherapy! After watching the kids and Eric battle a head cold for the last two weeks I myself have finally given in to it 100%. I worked on Friday and had a sore throat that just wouldn't go away. Saturday and Sunday I moped around the house feeling sorry for myself (and boy, can you tell, because this place is a MESS). Yesterday afternoon I decided if it hurt too much for me to take a nap, I probably had no business going to work. I zipped in to my family doctor's this morning, and he confirmed that I was, in fact, sick. Gee, thanks. Actually, I knew it's all he'd say, but I went to make sure I didn't have strep. My temp was a little higher than I thought, so I'm glad I went in for that reason as well. Now I can turn myself back in to that paranoid idiot who checks her temperature every 30 minutes because I'm so terrified of missing it jumping over the 100 mark. So far we're hanging in the low 99's, so hopefully that will be the end of it. I probably should be sitting on the couch right now, but honestly other than this stupid dagger sticking out of my neck, I feel decent, so couch sitting is boring. Maybe I could grade those papers... (see previous posting... oh, and to my former students who I NEVER would have done that to, don't worry, they're cutesy little drawings that the kids already got completion points for, and trust me, these kids aren't sweating it)
Carpe diem. - Trela

No News Is Good News!

So much for New Year's Resolutions! I can't believe how much LESS time I have to do anything with two little people running around (and all of you with more than one child are saying, "yes, Trela, we told you that..."). Blogging has fallen to the bottom of the list, right behind laundry and that pile of papers I collected in mid-December and have yet to grade, but still dutifully drag home each and every night in the faint hope that I might have an hour to sit and read. Yeah, right.

I began my third round of chemo on Wednesday. Again, no problems, and my nurse reassured me that at this point even if my veins totally freaked out on us, they'd work through it without making me get a port. Yippie! So far the veins are holding their own, and pushing lots of water the two days before treatment has been helping. It was just nice to know that this close to the end they'd find other solutions if the need arose. As of right now I have only 5 treatments left. I'm beginning to be a little fearful of the end of treatment-- a common cancer patient's fear, I understand. Mentally I feel like the chemo is battling any problems still around in my body, so I'm "safe." Now I'm nervous for the time ahead with no chemo backing me up. Of course I'm still hopeful and optimistic, but I don't refer to myself as "worst case scenario girl" for no reason. A great friend sent me a bracelet that reminds me to "expect great things" and that thought makes me smile when I see it on my wrist throughout the day.

My hair actually looks better than Cavanaugh's! Her baby fine stuff is still longer than mine, but my do is much thicker. So far it looks pretty straight, we'll see if that holds. Another two months or so and I'll be able to look like I got a significant haircut! My students are increasingly curious. I freaked out my loudest most obnoxious class by scooting my wig on my head -- brought them to a standstill and I taught a rather calm lesson from that point on. Not sure how that factors into the classroom management piece... regardless they've been much better the last week or so, perhaps in fear I'll do it again. My homeroom has seen a peek of my less-bald head, and it just causes questions, but I figure those are all teachable moments so we take little breaks from math in the morning and talk about it. I absolutely ADORE my homeroom this year, so it's definitely worth the time.

Anyway, that's about what I have time for -- Kile is watching "Babar" and Cavanaugh is convinced she doesn't need a nap right now. Eric's gone into the clinic to deal with a Saturday morning patient emergency. Time to go grade papers. Ha!

Carpe diem - Trela

Happy 2007!

New Year’s Resolution – Post to the blog more often.

New Year’s Resolution – Quit making New Year’s Resolutions that I won’t live up to.

So far 2007 is progressing very well for the Rottinghaus clan. Eric’s practice(s) are continually busy, my teaching is going reasonably well, Kile is usually charming, and Cavanaugh is, well, Cavanaugh. Medically (the entire reason for this blog) my chemo treatments are continuing to go well, and although the neuropathy has moved into my right foot as well, it’s really just the three littlest toes on each foot so I’m not having any problems. They seem to simply be tingly as opposed to numb, so that’s also a good thing! After my second to most recent dose I felt really out of it, even fell asleep on the way home, so they reduced my Benadryl and that made a huge difference. Last week I ate lunch, talked to Eric on the way home, and would have probably gone into work for my 1:30 meeting if he hadn’t accidentally dashed off to work with both sets of car keys in his pocket. Now if only I could find a way to avoid the thermostat changes, though vitamin E seems to be helping. Gosh, can’t wait to go through this again in 25 years!

Anyway, really not much else going on with us. We spent New Year’s Eve at a comedian (who used to be a counselor… there’s a “hmmm” for you!) who had a totally brilliant thought – so much so that I dug in my purse to write it down, though it turns out it’s practically engraved in my brain and writing it was pointless. People keep asking me how I can be so upbeat through this whole thing, and other than the whole optimism thing which I think is necessary, this guy filled in the rest of my answer: “You can’t worry when you’re laughing. It’s like crying and eating ice cream at the same time.”

Enjoy some ice cream, who cares if it’s January?

Carpe diem. - Trela

The Hallway is Green

My first week of work went well overall. I feel caught up on most things in my classroom (only a few papers to grade tonight!), and I'm pretty sure I've gotten all of the first names of my students down cold. I hope I don't meet them outside of my room anytime soon, but in the room, in their seats, I'm good.

After the Jesup tree-lighting on Friday evening (if you didn't hear Kile tell Santa over the loudspeaker that he wants Lighting McQueen for Christmas, you're one of very few who did not) my energy level took a little dip when I put Cavanaugh to bed. She kept squeaking in her typical diva-like "how dare you leave me alone" way, so I put my jams on with her and lay down on our bed...next thing I knew it was 3 am and I'd already had nearly seven hours of sleep. Clearly the energy came back, however, since Saturday was a flurry of Christmas shopping, cleaning, laundry (in fairness, Mom did the laundry and I watched), organizing, and yes, I painted the hallway green, something Eric noticed when he came home from Des Moines at about 2am. Fortunately he didn't touch it because he would have found it still a bit tacky since I finished at a bit before 1.

I'm feeling good again today, enjoying reading on my new porch (which starts my brain on another tangent... that's below), catching up with my parents, and only experiencing minor tingling in my toes (a side effect of my chemo). Hopefully next week will go as well and the tingling won't progress much more!

Ok, tangent -- I can't keep calling my new porch "the new porch." It's totally enclosed, has heat, lots of windows and is approximately 4 feet wide by 25 feet long. I'm taking suggestions for new names. I've already rejected sunroom because, face it, it's a glorified hallway, glorious though it is (it was 85 in there this afternoon with the sun!). Currently it is also housing our Christmas tree and my book which I'm now going to get back to...

Carpe diem. - Trela

Hi ho, hi ho!

WOW! I'm sitting at MY desk at WORK!!! My first day went overwhelmingly fantastic, and amazingly enough I'm not even that tired yet. Ok, a couple of snags on the way... left my lunch at home in my cute little Superman lunch bag... I can practically taste my red beans and rice that I will now have to throw away. Then there was the uncomfortable moment before I had class to explain to the kids why they can't hug me... imagine 15 rather exhuberant 8th graders running to you with arms outstretched, and then little sad faces as I told them to get the heck away from me with their snotty noses (ok, I was slightly nicer)... I'm overusing my elipses here, sorry.... Then there was my fabulous 5th period (formerly known as the class in which I count down the minutes until the purgatory ends) who actually applauded me when I walked into the room. Veteran teacher that I am, I wasn't swayed (though momentarily touched), and my suspicions were confirmed when one of my darlings wished I was back in the hospital when I told him he needed to be in his assigned seat (you know, the seat he begged me not to move him from when I change seats on Thursday, that seat). I LOVE MIDDLE SCHOOL!

Anyway, there were a few comments that I wasn't blogging enough, so there you go folks, an update!

Hope you're all well!
: )
Carpe diem - Trela

Look at Me! I'm Typing!

It's 5:41. I finished chemo at 3:30 this afternoon, and yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, I am sitting totally erect at the computer, typing at a reasonable speed, and even using (mostly) proper grammar and syntax. The new drug I'm on is, thus far, much easier to tolerate. They give me Benadryl prior to administering the chemo so I was slightly fuzzy for a few hours (personally I think it's just another ploy by the nursing staff so I don't try to drive myself anywhere). I have zero medications to take before my next treatment next week, so that's a minor relief. Setting my alarm for every 4, 8, 12, 16 hours after chemo was getting a bit old.

Other than that, things are continuing to be calm and peaceful around here. Oh, wait, that's because the kids are at the in-laws. Smirk. If all continues to go well I'll be heading to work on Monday to resume the helm. And apparently I'll be starting nautical school... chemo brain is sometimes a riot! (I mistakenly referred to the hospital as the hotel today while driving by... that was before treatment started.)

Hope Thanksgiving was a happy time to be with family and friends, ours definitely was.

Carpe diem. - Trela

44% Completed

Or something like that... the good news is I'm reportedly done with the 2 nastiest drugs I'll have to take. The week after Thanksgiving I'm scheduled to begin on the last drug of my chemo regimen, and that will take me until the first week of March. Unlike the once every three week schedule I've been on I'll transition to going once a week for three weeks, then a week off for just over three months. The "good" news is that my doctor thinks I'll be able to work again after I get adjusted to the new drug, so I'm really hoping to go back to work a couple of weeks before Christmas. While I've completely enjoyed the rest time and extra time with my kids, Cabin Fever is totally beginning to set in. The frequent visits from my parents have helped, but I'm really missing seeing my friends at work more regularly. This new drug is supposed to be gentler on my bone marrow, so I don't have to be quite so much the girl in the plastic bubble.

My most recent treatment went well, we ended up reducing my drugs by another 25% (math majors, you can figure that out) but they assured me there were actually still some meds in the IV. I caught Eric's cold overnight between treatments, but they allowed me some Tylenol and I think we've beaten that already. Hopefully it hit while I still had some white cells. I had my booster shot yesterday so I'm all muscle achy today, but it's not bad... interesting that this is the third time I've had the shot, yet this is the first time the accompanying paperwork told me to avoid large crowds after it. Hmmmm. Good thing I already had a brain in my head!

On the non medical front everything is going well for us. Eric's practices are keeping him busy (he's been going to bed before 11 which is unheard of!) and the kids are doing great. Cavanaugh is living up to her diva reputation and absolutely refuses to bend at the hip in order to sit on the floor. We know she CAN sit but if she catches on that's what you want her to do it's all over. Kile is finally starting to feel better after his encounter with hand foot and mouth and seems not to want to come home at all (the kids stay at Grammie and Papa's place during my treatments and the day after). At least we know he's comfortable in his surroundings.

I've now filled almost an entire drawer with cards from all of you. Amazingly enough they keep on coming! Just looking at it when I'm feeling lonely really helps, so thanks!

Carpe diem - Trela

Holiday Fun

Yikes, a little behind in our blog! Here's the kiddos on Halloween night pre-trick or treating. Kile went as Max from Where the Wild Things Are, Cavanauh was our own little jack o'lantern, and our friend Kennady was a little monster. The kids were able to dress up twice, once for our annual Pumpkin Carving Party Saturday night, and then again on the 31st.

Beyond all of that activity, it's been a busy couple of weeks highlighted by a visit from my brother, Ian, my sister, Cara, her boyfriend, Andrew and my parents. Can we say "family pictures?" Unfortunately other than for Ian, all of them had their week capped off with the same stomach bug that got me re-incarcerated on the 7th floor of Mercy Hospital for three days before their visit. Stupid white cells AGAIN!!! It's just wrong when nurses and techs walk into your hospital room and say, "don't I know you?" Sigh.

Only one more two day session of the "nasty" drugs this upcoming Tuesday and Wednesday. I'm not sure how long of a break I'll have before starting on the next (and hopefully last) drug which will take me into late February. It's supposed to be slightly kinder and gentler, though I'll be treated more frequently, basically once a week with a week off once a month. I'm sure somewhere in there we'll do a CT scan which I'm totally dreading, but I'm not sure when. We'll also likely consult with Mayo about the radiation issue one more time -- at this point we're probably not going to pursue it since there's no evidence it will help at all and we're concerned about the integrity of my skin and the tissue expander. My oncologist as well as the oncologist at Mayo are in support of that decision which is primarily based on the fact that Sloan Kettering said they wouldn't do radiation in my case. Since they're the expert I think we'll likely go with them!

Anyway, enough medical talk. I'm feeling well most of the time, but I do get a bit tired by about 9pm. Basically I feel like I've been teaching all day but I haven't been! I have one or two higher energy days a week, but most of the time it feels like after school on a Friday afternoon after a full week. One of the chemo side effects seems to be a complete inability to nap so I've just been sitting down a lot catching up on movies or reading. It's terrible, really. Smirk.

Carpe diem - Trela

Sad News

We learned this morning that our nephew, Garrett, passed away sometime last night. He would have been six months old next week, just a day younger than our Cavanaugh.

When you're going through something like cancer treatment it's pretty easy to become very focused only on yourself instead of on the outside world. What a tragic reminder that the rest of the world moves on no matter what personal struggles one is dealing with.

Our hearts go out to my brother-in-law Dean and his wife Meg as they cope with every parent's worst nightmare.

Carpe diem - Trela

3 down, 1 to go!

Well, it's the day after treatment and I've been up since 8:30, have already eaten breakfast, returned a phone call, and checked my email. I feel every so slightly out of it, but this is MILES ahead of the last two treatments afterwhich I spent the first day totally unconscious. Only one more set of this nasty bugger and then we move on to the reportedly kinder, gentler drugs.

After my adventure in the hospital the doctors decided to cut my dose by a full 30%, and I'm definitely feeling the difference. As long as it still does its job, I think we're good to go. I'm focusing on a day of relaxation, movie watching, and lying on various surfaces around the house. So much better than the last time! I can actually pick up the remote! All will be well until approximately 7:30 central time when the Cardinals take to the field... if they don't win I may be using this blog to either 1. sell Eric to the highest bidder or 2. find a new place to live.

- Carpe Diem, Trela

Round 3

Well, a 30% reduction in chemo dose seems to be a lot easier on the cute blonde. She is still feeling pretty tired and groggy, but overall she's feeling much better than after the previous two sessions.

The nurses at Oncology Associates told her that her priviledges had been revoked after she drove to Chris and Leisa's house. Trela, now the "bad girl" at the clinic is not allowed to be in possession of car keys while undergoing chemo. Like the bar drunk at closing time her protests that "I'm fine to drive... really." will not be accepted. Luckily there is no shortage of designated drivers for her.

About a week from now will be the low point for her blood counts, so we'll hope that she can avoid IV antibiotics and/or a hospital stay this time. We'll keep you posted.

Meg Riney stopped by for the afternoon yesterday and kept Trela company. From what Meg told me today, Loopy isn't just a classic childrens story book.

Other than that things here are going well, Kile and Cavanaugh are having a good time at Grammie's and things at work for me are getting accomplished.

Until next time...

The Girl in the Plastic Bubble

Oh, for Pete's sake people, I'm FINE!!! A fact I kept trying to convince the hospital staff of until at 4:05 today my doctor walked in and quite simply asked if I was ready to go home. I'm sure it wasn't a hallucination when at that precise moment the hospital loudspeaker suddenly broke into the Hallelujah chorus... ok, so it didn't, but if my life were a movie it would have been highly appropriate.

I'm pretty tired (since I've done all of that sitting around over the last five days) and my arm where the IV lived for nearly all five of those days is a bit sore, but honestly, I'm feeling pretty darn good. In fact, I really never felt that badly. I think this one we caught at the perfect time, though clearly to avoid it completely would have been better. The biggest annoyance today was having to wait almost two hours for my discharge papers and the nurse INSISTING I ride in a wheelchair to leave (even though I had seen other patients leaving on their own two feet, and even though I tried to convince her I wasn't lying when I said I'd walked a mile yesterday and half a mile today). Could be a lot worse, but isn't, a fact I remind myself of frequently.

So I'm all set to enjoy my vacation, I mean sick leave, encourage my little platelets to keep multiplying and bide time until Kile can come home. Thanks for all of the positive thoughts, messages, and prayers. They continue to get me through.

Carpe diem - Trela

Incubating a virus

Well, it looks like Trela's go round with the bacteria is over, (squashed the bugs) but Kile has been having a rough go of it with hand foot and mouth disease. Since this is (of course) a very contagious disease, and we're not sure if Trela has had it, Kile is going to live with grammy for the next few days if Trela gets to come home.

Sounds like she may be able to come home in the next day or two, as long has her blood counts hold and her vitals stay normal. She's feeling much better and even walked a mile (literally) in laps around the ward yesterday. She was very happy to see the Cardinals beat the Padres, (ok, maybe I was a little more pleased than she) and had a pretty good day yesterday.

Other than that, things continue to be very busy around here and I'm sure they will slow down sometime by 2008.

ERic

UPDATE: As I was signing my name Trela called and she made bail. Sounds like she'll be coming home today after all.

ERic

Human Petrie Dish

The last few days have been interesting to say the least. After her scheduled bloodwork came back on Wednesday and her white count(WBC) was at 0.2 (we were shooting for a minimum of 2 but 4-10ish is normal) one of the nurses called, asked how Trela was doing, and as if on cue, her temperature began to rise. Just like last time (when the lowest WBC reading was .6) we headed to CR for some IV antibiotics. This time, however, they decided to keep her overnight for observation, as her heart rate, and BP weren't quite right either.

One thing leads to another, and next thing you know, she's in the hospital until at least monday and the cultures they took of her blood started to look like that loaf of bread which has been sitting on the counter for a few months too long. While the don't know exactly which bug it is just yet, and the first round of drugs MAY have taken care of it, they are keeping her till Monday.

Meanwhile, she's gotten a blood transfusion, bunches of meds, and the promise that the next round of chemo will have a reduced dosage so that we don't get to do this all over agian in 3 weeks. On the bright side, we are about halfway through this first course, and the Taxol that comes next is supposed to be less severe.

So, Mom has been taking care of Kile and Cavanaugh, and I've been getting adjusted regularly from sleeping on the "cot" in Trela's Room.

Carpe Diem